In my field of paper flowers

I enjoy my own company. There! I said it. Every time I am out of my house, I look forward to running back to my room to have some me time. It’s so bad that I turn into a little monster when I have people staying over at mine…I feel claustrophobic. On my own, I am like the little girl ‘in my field of paper flowers and candy clouds of lullaby’. Surely, this is unhealthy.

Don’t get me wrong, I love having people over especially when I can show off my culinary and barista skills but how do you explain to people that they should leave you alone because you want to spend some time with yourself? I think back to times when I lived with my family and how I was always holed up in my room. My parents hated it. My nose was always in a book or I was writing in my journal and drinking an awful lot of red wine. I think I am the only child in the universe whose parents wanted to go out more. 

I think it is necessary to be at peace with one’s self and truly enjoy one’s company but it is a little retarded and perhaps unhealthy if one doesn’t learn to enjoy the company of others. I am truly in a dilemma now, how do I change this?

I came up with a temporary fix and that is to go out every week to a random event in the city (so help me God). I decided to start with a not so random one and that’s a sports festival organised by my church. It’s gonna be tomorrow evening and even though I know that I would dread the awkward conversations I may have to strike up with people or the fake smiles that would be on display, I am going to be there no matter what.


I am thankful for eventbrite as it helps with finding random but interesting stuff to go for. Next on my list is the ‘Body language’ exhibition at Saatchi. I really look forward to that (and who knows, I may actually meet new people). 

In other news, I started watching ‘Orange is the new Black’ today…it’s a really lovely series and really can’t wait to be done watching it all . Ah…I should not say that, being out of the house more means that I don’t get to watch series as often as I would like to. Bummer! 


Have a lovely day people!



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