I needed time out to get my act together. You know how sometimes it seems like everything that can go wrong in you life goes wrong all at once? Yea, that was how I felt but I have learned over the years that feelings are irrelevant. What is relevant is what I know and the fact that I rely upon my knowledge than upon my feelings.
Okay, I hope I am not confusing all y’all because I don’t know how to explain this. Let’s just say I came to a point in my life where I felt like I had no idea what I was doing anymore and felt like I had no purpose and no one to even talk to about how I felt. I did not even want to go to Hillsong any more because it just seemed like everyone was too busy for me and only had my time when they needed me to do something. Yea, I was having a great pity party.
I snapped out of it because God was not having any of it. Like seriously, there is no other way to explain how I snapped out of it. I read Paul and Silas’ story and realised that even in the dungeon, they praised God. Here I was, in my cosy room, under my plush duvet moaning about my feelings. God was definitely not pleased with me. I got the impression that He actually ensured that no one checked up on me during that period because He wanted me to learn how to solely rely on Him and pay no heed to my feelings.
So I got my favourite songs together from the (Hillsong Live) Glorious ruins CD and sang like my life depended on it…cos it did anyway. The songs I kept on repeat were “Christ is enough” and “Glorious Ruins”.
“Through every trial my soul will sing; No turning back, I’ve been set free. Christ is enough for me…everything I need is in You…”. That was my mantra all through that period. It got worse but this time, I remembered what I knew and with a smile on my face and my beautiful voice on the highest pitch I sang like I never sang before.
It amazes me how much I know about God and how deep my relationship is with Him and yet when issues arise, I moan. Well, not anymore. I refuse to moan and I have decided to be happy, thankful and excited irrespective of what happens to me or how I feel because let’s face it, feelings are irrelevant in the scheme of things.
PS: No pictures today…maybe tomorrow?
Have a fabulous day people.